Archive for the ‘Advice’ Category

“When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries of life disappear and life stands explained.”  Mark Twain

Question 1: Why don’t men like to be asked questions like, “Do you love me?” or, “How do you feel about me?”

Answer: Men display love through actions, not words. The fact that a man does something nice [unsolicited] for a woman speaks volumes. On the second question, men are repulsed by women with inferiority issues if only because it renders their  “conquests” meaningless.

Question 2: “How many people have you slept with?”

Answer: I don’t know.

Question 3: How do you feel about cheating?

Answer: The same way I feel about female passive-aggression, which I’ve discussed ad nauseam.

Question 4: Do you check out other women when you’re on a date?

Answer: Yes. But both genders are guilty of this practice. One’s just more discrete.

Question 5: Would you enjoy a threesome?

Answer: It’s not a preoccupation of mine, but sure, given the right circumstances, why not?

Question 6: Would you let a girlfriend drive your sports car?

Answer: On an empty road in broad daylight.

Question 7: Can a girl join a bunch of guys on their night out?

Answer: As long as she doesn’t inhibit their arrested adolescence.

Question 8: Do you usually know what a woman is thinking?

Answer: Sure. It’s usually several things at once, and most of them unresolved.

Question 9: If you think a girlfriend’s friend is hot, would you sleep with her?

Answer: No.

Question 10: What questions from a woman are off-limits?

Answer: “Do you love me?” “Am I good enough?” “Since I have no life, can you give me one?”

Question 11: Do men like comments like, “Can I bring you a beer?”

Answer: Yes, because it indicates she’s wired into the male psyche and willing to validate it.

Question 12: Would two BJs be too much for one evening?

Answer: For me, one would be enough. “Too much” is a bit strong, though.

Question 13: Why don’t men attach as easily as women?

Answer: I don’t know. But once they are [attached] it usually requires a police escort and a restraining order to get rid of them.

Question 14: Do you think women really want to know what a man’s thinking?

Answer: If they really considered it, NO.

Question 15: What’s he willing to do to get you into bed?

Answer: If he’s physically attracted to you, pretty much anything. Your vivid imagination simply isn’t enough to match his determination.

[end]